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Hello fellow fans of South Park!

Sam here, suffering from a severe case of "Fresh Production Assistant" syndrome (a one hundred percent, clinically certified disease, by the way). But, fear not! I have been doing my best to get in just the right amount of late-night Starbucks runs before every meal, as per my doctors orders.

But enough about me . . . let's talk about me. My prodigious background in programming of the highest caliber led me to this lofty position as a PA. In fact, my first job in Los Angeles was on none other than the critically acclaimed Bad Girls Club Season 3. Now, I'm not sure if you've seen this show, but it's a healthy mix of 24 meets Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, with a slight hint of Brittney Spear's Oscar winning Crossroads tossed in. In fact, on my first day on the job, one of the lovely Bad Girls tried to use her womanly ways to tempt me into staying as I dropped her off at her hotel. Stay classy, Bad Girls!

After that amazing experience, I worked on other such box office smashes as the Real World/ Road Rules Challenge: The Duel 2, and the Youtube sensation, Eros Rammazzotti's "Parla Con Me". Seriously. If your soul doesn't weep with reminiscent tears of your childhood, you have no soul. . .

Thank God for South Park.
-Sam

The first thing I thought to say was, "That's a great story Sam. Tell it again.", but I don't want to be that much of a dick to a new guy.
I'll be honest, you're doing what the majority of us wish we could be doing. And it looks like you had a hell of a ride getting there. (you poor, poor man) Thank god the good-good-strong-have people at SPS saved you from having to get poppers for Paula Abdul, or a bathtub full of Unicorn tinkle for a Kardashian. Now you can focus on getting RedBull, porn, and Thai food for M&T like a regular person!

Just as an aside, has anyone ever told you you kinda look like Michael Sinternikklas?

That made me irl LoLz. Nicely done.

And Bug- I agree. He does slightly resemble Sinterniklaas (Venture bros! <3) But I still see a little bit of Ryan Phillippe in there too.

Explains why Starbucks today announced that they are paying dividends to stockholders for the first time



Al-righty (followed by a very interesting resume . . . . . . . .)



I'm soulless



Indeed. Have a great episode 1402, and have a great season Sam and to all at South Park

Seriously? Have you ever done any P.A. work?

I'll bet if you ask dude if this is his dream job, he'll tell you it's a stepping stone. It's like mandatory, dehumanizing hazing you have to submit to to get a decent job in the industry.

A P.A. is one step lower than being a fluffer, 'cause fluffers don't have to go fetch bagels and coffee.

Well, if you're a P.A., is there another person or duo you'd rather work for than Matt and Trey?

No, but working for SPS in any capacity would be fckuing awesome in my book. Besides, PA's make the little world over there go 'round. They need a constant supply of caffeine and sugar to keep cranking out a show.